Thursday, March 10, 2011

My Search for Religion

Several years ago, I saw an advertisement for Bill Maher’s movie “Religulous.” Having had disagreements in my head with the Roman Catholic church, I thought that this movie would be a fun watch. When I finally saw the movie, I was disappointed. I suppose my expectations were too high. What I wanted to see was the comedy of how religion messed up people’s lives. I did see that very much.

But what I also saw was the utter black hole that was in Bill Maher’s life. I would have thought that wisdom would have found him by now, but alas, it had not. Instead of being able to reconcile the multiplicities of how humans perceive God, Bill Maher simply refuted it and said there is none. And, as I recall, one way to annihilate the existence of God was to use the inhumanity of man.

After that movie, I could never watch Bill Maher again. How can I? I can not listen to someone who has simply given up in their search for the world to make sense.

Wow, isn’t that a bold statement for me to make? Yes it is. But it is only because I have gone through a journey in which I have made the whole cycle. I began as a child baptized into the Roman Catholic church and indoctrinated into the church’s teachings. By the age of 13, the age of reason struck my head and I began to leave the and question the church’s teachings. By the age of 22, I entered into graduate school in the biological sciences where I found even more evidence to contradict church teachings.

Then, an unusual series of events began to happen to me to reconsider. First, I had to give a church dispensation to my wife in order for me to marry her. I, who had not practiced in Church had to give dispensation to someone who had gone through Catholic school in high school. This was utter non-sense and was outlandish to me.

Then, I found my teacher Tuhan Joseph Arriola. Tuhan is a teacher of martial arts and financial responsibility. He commented that “If someone is truly a master, they are a master of all things in their life. Those who are a master of only one aspect is not truly a master.” This statement resonated in my whole being for the last 3-4 years. Each time I met an individual, this question always presented itself.

Third, I saw postings by Neil Shenvi. If a chemist can reconcile God and science, why could I not?

Fourth, and this is really that thing that spurred me on to come back to the Church, I saw that many individuals in the world were basically making fun and using Christianity as a punching bag for their otherwise sad, pathetic, Bill Maher-like life. Don’t blame religion for why your life sucks. Do something about your life sucking. Bwahahaha!

I already know that someone will challenge me to prove to them the existence of God. Being nice, I will simply tell you what I had to go through in order to finally be capable of understanding the nature of spirituality. I trained in a multiplicity of disciplines.

1. Seven years of graduate school and 2 years of post-doctoral research to train my logic and my scientific thinking.
2. Ten years of financial teaching from Tuhan Joseph Arriola from the Kamatuuran School of Kali. This taught me that men and women can be summed with respect to the physical, the intellectual, and the spiritual.
3. Six years of writing investigative reports for scientific products. This put into use my training in logic and my training in root cause analysis and corrective action.
4. Twenty years of curiosity and reading books on philosophy, religion, and metaphysics, physics, chemistry, quantum theory, statistics, mathematics, logic and history.

Now, if you have this, and you still have not reconciled in your head the disparate elements of life and God, give it seven more years. It took me 24 years.

Now, here's a message for those who would denigrate any religion because they can't figure their shit out.

But, if you make fun of my religion, or of any other religion because you have not taken the time nor the energy to understand life, you my friend are asking for trouble. You stand on one leg out of a possible three. When life takes his turn to smack your ass, you will fall. And when you fall, I will be the flaming hand of God (in all of his various forms of incarnations) ready to strike to finish your ass for not working enough to figure out your sad, pathetic shitty life.

I am not a passive, nice, religious, Christian. I am not an extremist Christian. (I accept all people as travelling a circle. Some are at the beginning, some are in the middle, some are at the end, some are starting their journey to the next level. I care not for you actual religion, sexual orientation, or racial history.) If you make fun of me or my religion and your joke is pitiful and does not make me laugh, I will pray to that part of God (in his multiple incarnations) to make you miserable by taking away your enjoyment of sex, food, spirits and tobacco.

I have come into this world ready to accept people. But if I find that you are part of a war against my religion, understand me when I say that I will lay waste to your existence, crush you as my enemy, drive you before me, hear the lamentation of your women and the silence of your children. (Reference to the author of Conan the Barbarian. That’s right, we co-opt all the best there is in other people’s cultures. It’s a proven method to convert heathens and non-believers into rightful, sheepful subjects of the Crown of God).

I was not a person who could accept God based on faith. I asked the universe to give me the insight to understand God beyond the way of faith. I have received what I asked for when I was thirteen years old. I envy others who could accept God on faith alone.

So if you’re life is f*cked up beyond recognition, go do something about it. Don’t blame religion. Don’t blame others. Only you can change your life, dumbass!

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